Choices

I like to listen to Tyrese Gibson not only sing, but share his wisdom. A while back (before I started meditating or practicing mindfulness) he said something in one of his videos about choices we make everyday and how they play a big part in determining whether or not you will be at peace and live happily. He used this example: a women on a reality show will contemplate whether or not she's going to go to a party where she may have a conflict with another women or group of women there. The answer is simple. Don't go. She already knows what may happen, she already knows how she's going to feel when she is at the party and she already knows how these women make her feel period. So now there is a choice to make. Will she go and risk having a drama filled night? Or will she choose to stay home (or go somewhere else) and continue to be happy? I don't know what the answer is but I know what mine would be!

It's funny because I get into these situations a lot, specifically with females. I don't hang out in a group of women. I don't have drama with any women. I just simply don't look for drama. I understand that shit happens in life with your friends and that's fine, if they are friends. Have I ever done these things? Of course, but let me tell you why I stopped. It's simple. It didn't make me happy. People remember how you made them feel. I always remember how I felt in a situation. I may not always remember exactly what was said or who was there but I remember how I felt in that moment. I've been around people I've called friends and I remember feeling like, why am I here?.. I'd rather be home talking to my boyfriend...these bitches are haters...omg was that just an insult lol?. It was a constant question. "Is this normal for women to do?" "Is it just me that rather have a normal friendship or no friendship at all?" "Do all women do this? "Do they get together and secretly hate each other, back stab each other, compete and then hang out the next day to shake off the edge?" "How does this work for some women?" It doesn't work for me. That's what I have realized. So I stopped dealing with a ton of people! I remember one summer, as a teenager, I was so sick of a few friends that I stayed in the house and went out by myself all summer long. I needed to recoup. I needed a clear head.

Tyrese's example hit a home run with me because I'm such a social person while also being somewhat of an introvert. I guess in a way I am an ambivert. I'm both. I love meeting new people, going new places and doing new things. On the other side of that, I feel drained of all my energy when dealing with other people, period. I personally need a good balance for me. I found my balance by making different choices with my friends and other people I come in contact with. If someone doesn't give me a good vibe now, I cut them off. I don't see the point in maintaining unhealthy useless relationships. They are a begging cry for drama!

I not only see that by making that choice has made me happier, but it worked! Making choices to just be happier and more peaceful works! So I started making other choices in my life. I'm nowhere close to where I want to be in life yet, but I can honestly say I feel more at peace. What choices can you make in your life to take away any unnecessary stress? It could be finding a job closer to your home because you hate traveling far for work, or something smaller like painting your room a different color because you chose not to hate the old color more and more each day! The choice is yours! I hope that all your choices start to bring you more and more peace!